Frankie says “Take care!”

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Angela Hospice Music Therapist Heather Dean
by Heather Dean, MT-BC

On Thursday the 17th I received the most sorrowful phone call from my father. My grandmother Frances (Frankie) Dickson had passed. Although I was expecting the news any day, it still felt like a shock to my system. I was in the B Wing office when I heard the news, so I quickly dashed over the admin side of the building so I didn’t “lose it” in front of any of our dear patients. What a blessing to work in hospice where I was greeted with hugs from a social worker, two volunteer coordinators and a spiritual care worker!

I ugly cried and took a long walk. I contemplated whether I should come to work the next day. Obviously this was not going to happen after “grief brain” had set in. I made a pot of lentil soup with no lentils. I left toast in the toaster and couldn’t figure out why I was so hungry. This is all normal, but also a big sign that I needed rest and to do my grief work. I thought, what would my grandma do?

Frankie Dickson
My grandmother was an accomplished painter and loved all sorts of crafts. I took a trip to the Dollar General the next day. I found a frame that I could glue sea shells around to adorn a picture of my grandmother and I together. And then I found something AMAZING: a paint-inside-the-lines canvas drawing with wildflowers and the words: You Belong Among the Wildflowers. This happens to be the lyrics of a favorite song of mine by the late Tom Petty. My grandmother was also a wonderful gardener and loved painting pictures of flowers after cutting photos out of places like Better Homes and Gardens.

I went home and listened to my East Coast playlist that contains all my memories of driving out to Virginia to see my grandma and of course the song "Wildflowers." I have never been a crafty person, but as I was coloring away I could see how this was so rewarding to my grandmother. I learned recently that the activity of engaging in creative arts combined with music can help draw us out of our “heart space” into our “head space” where our grief may take a pause to feel less painful. It really was a comforting experience. I encourage anyone who is mourning the loss of a loved one to give this a try.


You belong among the wildflowers
You belong somewhere close to me
You belong somewhere you feel free
You belong somewhere you feel free
-Tom Petty


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