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Showing posts from December, 2019

Resolutions for Healing

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By Debbie Vallandingham, LMSW-ACSW, Bereavement Manager Even as you face loss, the world keeps turning and time keeps ticking. It’s this time of year that it seems most noticeable. A new year carries special symbolism as many raise a glass to toast the end of the old and the beginning of something new and exciting. At the same time, the year end is often a time of reflection and remembering those we have lost throughout the year. History shows us that we have been celebrating the arrival of the new year for as long as 4,000 years, beginning with the ancient Babylonians. The tradition of making New Year’s resolutions is also an old one, which began during the reign of Julius Caesar. Although we no longer decorate our homes with laurel branches or celebrate like the Romans, we have made resolutions a big part of our festivities. As we move along our grief journeys, making resolutions is a tradition we should embrace, even if we have fears on what the New Year may bring. Some reso

Hugs from Heaven

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Sage and Stephanie with Angela Hospice Director of Development Bob Alexander. Sage installed the Wii he donated in the Care Center playroom. Stephanie Bowers said she never wins anything – until now. It was actually October 25 that her ticket was pulled in the $1 Raffle at Angela Hospice’s Light Up a Life Auction & Gala. It was a bit of a fluke that Stephanie even ended up with a ticket. Construction had re-routed her trip to her regular grocery store, so she ended up at Busch’s in Canton instead, where Angela Hospice volunteers were just setting up their table preparing to sell raffle tickets. Her mother, Nancy Rafail, had just recently passed at the Angela Hospice Care Center. Stephanie and her mom, Nancy Rafail “The day she passed away we had like 15 people, almost the entire family got to be with her,” Stephanie explained. “And she still knew and communicated enough, and then she was like, ‘Nap, time for a nap.’ And we were like, ‘You rest now.’ I left and she passe

U of M Dearborn Students Design Art Projects for Grieving Children at Angela Hospice

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These U of M Dearborn students presented a total of nine projects for Angela Hospice's social work and bereavement team to engage with young clients. Through a collaborative grant from the Ford Motor Company Fund, students from U of M Dearborn designed therapeutic art interventions aimed at helping children and teens who are coping with grief. On December 6, they demonstrated the projects for Angela Hospice staff, and presented custom project kits for Angela Hospice’s social work team to use in completing the activities with grieving children and teens. These students created a drum. The drum can be  decorated in the color(s) of the client's choosing and  can be played in different ways to express different  emotions. “The art projects that the students presented on were extremely creative,” said Sara Waters, a social worker in Angela Hospice's bereavement department. “Working with kids and teens, oftentimes they use art as a way to express their feelings. I

What is Palliative Care?

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     It's a question we hear often, and you may have wondered yourself. The simplest answer: it's about comfort . So you may not be surprised to hear that Angela Hospice has been piloting a Palliative Care program to expand comfort care to more individuals. The program has been officially greenlighted to expand its capacity.      "The idea of Palliative Care is to provide symptom management, the skill that hospice has, to a patient population beyond the last six months of life," said Chief Medical Officer for Angela Hospice, Dr. James Boal. "There may be people who are not hospice eligible according to Medicare/Medicaid guidelines, but still want a community-based approach — or there may be people who are perfectly eligible for hospice, but they're a little too nervous to sign up for it yet."      Palliative Care also offers a way to provide continued support for Angela Hospice patients who must be discharged from hospice care if their condition has im

Love in an Unlikely Place

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      Justin Eades didn't believe in soulmates...until he met Noelle Mayer.      It was June 17, 2018, and Justin and his family were at the Angela Hospice Care Center where his aunt Rebecca was being admitted. Just down the hall, Noelle was with her grandmother, Viola DeFelice, for their Tuesday night tradition, watching America's Got Talent .      After six months of visiting her grandmother nearly every day, the Care Center felt like home to Noelle. She remembers she was wearing sweatpants that day and had thrown her hair up in a bun, but Justin thought she was adorable.      "She was very noticeable," Justin said. "Very cute, very rushed." Plus her grandmother kept yelling her name whenever Noelle would leave the room.      "It wasn't appropriate for me to be like, 'Hey, can I get your number?' I don't even think she would have heard me," Justin said. "She was like the Energizer bunny every time she walked by."

Choosing to Live

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How does life change for a 28 year old when they begin hospice care? According to Chelsea Williams, things haven’t changed much at all. “When you have the little ones, you just keep trucking,” Chelsea said, having just returned from an appointment at her kids’ school. When she learned last March that she had cervical cancer, she went through chemo and radiation, but she said she mostly did that for her mother Penny’s sake. “When you first find out, you want to at least, I guess, give it your shot, your round,” Chelsea explained. And she said she didn’t want her mom to wonder “what if....” Chelsea zip-lining in Jamaica. When Chelsea completed her treatment, her grandmother sent her, her mother, and sisters on a celebratory cruise to Jamaica, where they climbed to the top of the Dunn’s River Falls, and zip-lined their way back down. But when they returned home, there was bad news waiting. The cancer had metastasized to Chelsea’s lungs and bones. “But I don’t feel any diff

The Twelve Tips of Holiday Grief

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by Debbie Vallandingham, LMSW-ACSW Angela Hospice Bereavement Manager Debbie Vallandingham and therapy dog Piper We grieve all year long, but there is something that is different at the holidays. This is a time that is filled with memories of celebrations of old. The holidays are also known for gratitude, charity, and giving to others. Yet, those who are grieving often feel overwhelmed by memories. They feel the pain of loss and often feel guilty for dwelling on their emotions. Those grieving can find themselves exhausted trying to fill the demands of cleaning, cooking, baking, shopping and decorating In grief at this time of year, we are at risk of being lured into excess, whether it’s eating too many cookies or feeling tired after one too many drinks. Tackling the holidays without a plan can be difficult. But as you prepare, you should consider the Twelve Tips of Holiday Grief: 1) Everyone grieves differently. Whatever you think “normal” is – throw that out of your mind